The first one I told.

I did go out a couple of times to a gay club and finally knew for sure that I preferred guys above girls. But I didn’t know how to tell my best friend the “news”. A straight friend I did go out with a friend I did go on vacation with.

At work I gave him a couple of hints on msn. We were talking about up coming weekend on what to do and where to go. He made a suggestion about going to a club where nice people were. I said that it was not my kind of people. He asked me what do you mean. I told him that some people or just not meant for me. He still didn’t understand anything about it. And I told him to let it go.

I almost cried and went out the door for a smoke. I cried and while I’m crying I didn’t give a sh.. about it anymore and told myself he has the right to be the first one to know. I took my phone out of my pocket and send him a sms. “I prefer guys above girls that’s what wrong. I’m afraid to tell you this because I don’t want to loose you as a friend”.

I did go back to my computer and waited. I asked him on msn if he received my sms. And he did. “I wouldn’t worry about that. If you have the need to talk about just give me a call.” Immediately I burst into tears. He asked me if we should call now. And I walked out the door again for a smoke. On the phone he told me again not to worry about it and he said we live in 2005. I know people who are gay and I’m ok with that. I feel bad because you  are crying about it and that you couldn’t tell me this sooner. We talked about it for an hour. I felt so relieved.